The Good Times?

I stayed with him in the US for two weeks. That was November 2021.

I had no idea what would come next but we were talking about our future and how we we will make it work.

When I came back we were on the phone all the time, sometimes falling asleep together (even though there was a time difference). We spoke a lot when I had night shifts in the hotel.

I don’t know if I mentioned that. I was working in a 4 star hotel as a Sales and Marketing Specialist (organizing weddings, conferences, birthdays, catering etc)

Then he surprised me by saying that he will come and see me for Christmas. He did Uber to save for a ticket. 

I have to get off my chest what was happening then.

It is very private, I didn’t want to mention it, but nobody else is reading it anyway. 

At this point in his career, he was demoted for sleeping with a lower rank female soldier a year before (December 2020) while in Germany. 

It is important to the story - that’s why his girlfriend broke up with him. And that another one of so many red flags.

He made less money and decided he wants to sell his house because he can’t afford it, even with two renters.

So he comes for Christmas and it’s great. I took time off work and we had a good time. We ate good food, rested, went to the gym a couple times and went to my favorite place - Gdynia. A city by the Baltic Sea.

We solidified our relationship. I don’t remember us arguing during that time. We laughed, we were very attracted to each other, made love a lot…etc.

I was crying hard when he went back home. I had no idea what will come next, and soon.

I was saving money, because it seemed like it was my turn to visit. 

I missed him and I had no leave days, so I decided to quit my job. I was tired of it anyway. They used and abused me. I was supposed to work as a Sales and Marketing Specialist and I did reception most of the time, because they fired a lot of people during covid. I’m a hell of a good worker, so I knew I can make a career in a different place (My manager was tired too, so he left a couple months after me).

In January Gonzalo sold his house. With a lot of profit. He bought it for $ 250,000 and sold for $ 320,000. 

I had a little debt in Poland from all the flights that I took so he gave me 3k to cover that. I didn’t ask, he offered and I agreed. 

He moved to an apartment complex.

I went to see him at the end of February 2022 to celebrate my birthday together and rest from working.

He had no furniture, gave everything away. I think he only had a mattress, tv and washer and dryer.

I enjoyed my stay though. On my birthday he took me to a local safari (because I really love animals) and to a fun restaurant by the lake. 

He proposed. 

A month later we were married.

He bought furniture. He also sold his car, so he had no debt .

He got a lawyer for my immigration case. It was expensive, almost 6 thousand dollars. 

He bought a much cheaper truck and I thought we were good.

But that’s when I started to notice his issue with money.

He made a lot on selling his house, where did all of that money go? If You ask him, he probably won’t remember. 

I mean, don’t get me wrong - he paid for my debt, paid for the lawyer, paid for the furniture - let’s say that was about 15 thousand dollars. That’s a huge amount of money of course, but the profit he made on the house was much bigger.

We were married but he never told me how much he makes or never asked me for permission to buy something. One day he came home and had his truck lifted and got new wheels. I think that was almost 10 thousand dollars. 

I was furious. That’s how much we paid for the truck!!! Why would you put so much money into it?!

We argued.

We also argued a lot, because my medication from Poland stopped working. I had sleepless nights, horrible anxiety and he was not supportive at all. 

I had my first panic attack in 3 years: I was supposed to receive a flu vaccine for my immigration case. I am mildly allergic to eggs so at the clinic they refused to give it to me. I insisted and they said that if I start having trouble breathing, I have to go to the ER immediately. So I panicked, because I thought I was losing my breath in the car.

G. got very angry. He started speeding to go home and took a sharp turn and scared me. When we reached the house he shouted at me to call my parents so they can call me down. That’s what I did and soothing words of my father helped a bit.

G. didn’t know what to do. Before we got married I told him exactly how my condition looks like. He was aware, but thought I was better, because he only saw the good times.

He wasn’t ready, and still isn’t - for the bad times.

Ps:

I only came to America with one bag. My apartment in Poland was untouched. All of my things left behind. I had no idea what’s gonna happen.

It was a spontaneous decision. Probably too spontaneous. We met June 2021, married April 2022. We didn’t know how real life is gonna look.

I think he had a false image of me.

All we did is had fun and have sex and I guess he thought that’s all I was.

That’s enough for today…